Gainsaying Gift-giving and other things

Of late, I find myself agreeing with The Luddite's views on many things, the latest being the obligation that people find themselves in to gift something to others. As I read through the article, I kept nodding and thinking to myself, "Yes, yes, that's how I feel. Exactly." I find a lot of social customs quite affected and unnecessary, especially ones that are anachronistic.

Table manners, for instance. Apart from the fact that we are conditioned to like people who know their soup spoon from their dessert spoon, there's very little to be proud about having impeccable table manners. As long as we're able to eat a table without making a mess at the table, it should be quite okay to use one spoon where table manners mandate use of another. These artificial rules are usually perpetuated by the snobs who consider such things to be the mark of gentlemen / ladies. As if being a gentleman has got anything to do with the way one eats one's food at a table. Such superficiality turns me off!

Gift-giving is another. I prefer to give gifts only when I genuinely feel like doing so, not because I am expected to. That's why I've come to hate attending weddings in which I am not exactly a friend of the bride or the groom. I mean, am I any less a person if I fail to get a gift? Is not friendship the greatest gift one can give another?

I like my gifts to be valued, not forgotten and thrown away the moment I step out of the wedding hall. That's also why I prefer gifting people in person, and not in a social gathering.

For two people with such extraordinarily different backgrounds, I am beginning to think of Tony Long as a kindred spirit.